Apple of Our Eye - Dodgeball! by Tiffaninichole

Dodgeball!
by tiffaninichole
Rating: NC17
Genre: AH, Noncanon Pairing

Apples:

Monika says:

I will admit, I'm not the biggest Non Canon fan out there. I'm a die hard Edward and Bella devotee, and I can count the number of non canon pairing stories I've read on one hand. However, my eyes were definitely opened with Dodgeball.

I first found my way to tiffaninichole via her PTB Smut University's Yearbook submission, Drunk Sex, where I was first introduced to her delightful world of Jasper and Bella. In this OS, Jasper and Bella are best friends who end up, after a night of guzzling liquor non stop, creating sexy times in an alcoholic haze. Suffice to say, I was compelled to read more of her work.

Surrounded by red balls, Jasper and Bella's rivalry is known far and wide by anyone who competes in Dodgeball. On and off the court, they often try to best one another. Their underhanded practical jokes are the driving force behind their continuing feud. Both are too stubborn to give up, and so their pranks are often held as revenge.

I plug in my blow dryer, set it on high, point it towards my head and turn it on full blast.

"AAAAAAAAGH! What the hell?" I scream. I quickly drop the dryer and blink my eyes, trying to see what's going on. What the fuck? Something's coating my throat, making me gag and spit and cough like crazy. I can't see, so I walk like a mummy with my hands out, trying to feel for the sink. When I find it, I turn on the water and rinse my eyes out. I look around, blinking my eyes rapidly to rid them of the tears, trying to figure out what happened when I see Alice and Angela doubled over in silent laughter, gasping for breath.

"What the fuck's so funny?" I spit.

"Jasper... Put... Powder... In your dryer!" Angela heaves out before crumbling to the floor, laughing maniacally.

"Oh GOD, Bella! That was... The funniest shit E-VER! One minute you're just standing there and the next, you're in a cloud of white dust!" Alice yells as tears of laughter roll down her face.

"BELLA!... Your... Hair... Is... ASHY!"

At this point, everyone's come into the room to see what's going on and my whole team breaks out into hysterics. Fucking Jasper.

On championship night, it's the inevitable, Bella's team versus Jasper's team. Bella's team takes victory after she wins her revenge shot with a ball straight toward Jasper's face. However, it is hardly the highlight of the night as we find our character's later creating sexy times in a bar bathroom.

What's to follow are even more sexy times, even crazier practical jokes, and an impossible relationship we tried to see coming but was only deterred by the prolonged supposed hatred of each other, which I suppose is what kept drawing me back and wanting to read the next chapter.

I knew Bella and Jasper's intimate and affectionate relationship was inescapable, but I wasn't quite sure how they would each surpass their own stubbornness. The ride toward girlfriend/boyfriend status was bumpy, both Jasper and Bella manipulating the other into admitting their feelings not only to themselves but to each other, and despite their growing attraction, the witty and hilarious dialog and narrative between the two is not lost.

Tiffaninichole does an excellent job in remembering who her characters are, and just because they are now fornicating, she doesn't lose sight of what made this story great in the first place: her humorous characterization.

Of course we aren't left with a simple HEA. Jasper and Bella are both to hard headed and fearful of what they have to ride off into the sunset together. Tiffanichichole does a good "eye bulging, OMG, did that really just happen?" momentous scene. Of what? That I won't spoil, you'll just have to read the story to find out.

I gave Dodgeball! by Tiffaninichole four out of five apples. The sexy and funny times award it its high rating.

Dodgeball! is definitely a fun read for both canon and non canon fans alike. If you didn't like Jasper and Bella pairing before, you will after you read this. It doesn't change or influence our choices of fan fiction. It just adds to the long list of what we already love. I know the next time I see a non canon pairing sitting on my to be read list, I will give it more than just a passing look.